November 19, 2013

Marriage is...


This is a topic that has been on my mind a lot. Perhaps it has to do with my baby brother getting married in 3 days (what?!) or the fact that so many of my friends from high school and college are getting engaged. Or maybe it's simply because I love what marriage stands for. Either way, thinking about it nonstop has caused me to stop and reflect truly what marriage means to me. Usually when I see these posts I immediately get turned off because they are so sappy. But I'm joining the bandwagon today and sharing my personal and special (sappy) thoughts and I'm sending them off into the world. 

  • Marriage is loving your spouse unconditionally. Honestly, I have just started to really understand what this means. Maybe I'm a slow learner, but after four years of marriage to Mr. Denver, I can honestly say I love him more than I did when we got married. Somehow, I've learned to deal with his quirks, and he has learned to deal with mine. So what if he likes to leave his dishes by his computer, or if I have books literally all over the house. Those are so trivial compared to what we have yet to share in life and eternity. 

  • Marriage is not perfect. What? I thought marriage was supposed to be a breeze. You are married to the man or woman whom you love more than life itself. Shouldn't it be bliss? You both have covenanted with each other to love and support each other throughout eternity. Yes, even though marriage is covenanting with one another and God, we are not perfect. And sometimes words are said, feelings are hurt, and actions disappoint. But despite our human flaws, we need to keep in mind that the one you are married to is the one for you at this time. I found this quote today that I really feel in love with. Here it is:

He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect for more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.” – Bob Marley 

  • Marriage is what you put into it. If there is anything I could tell newly engaged couples, or newlyweds, it's this. Marriage is hard work. It is full of sweet moments, and also bitter ones. You cannot allow your marriage to grow stagnant. If you put all your effort into making your marriage work, you will see more happiness, gratitude, and love in your lives.

So I'm not an expert on anything by any stretch of the imagination. But I do share what I know. And this is what I know-I love what marriage stands for. And I am grateful to have a best friend who isn't perfect. But he is perfect for me.