August 3, 2015

Dear Lincoln #2

Dear Lincoln, 

I can't believe how much you've changed since the months go by! You are sure wiggly and letting me know you are in charge. I like feeling you move because it's a powerful reminder of the precious cargo I am carrying. It's definitely a surreal experience. Whenever you kick me I make your Dad stop what he's doing to feel you move. It shocks him every single time. To tell you the truth, it shocks me as well. 

I know you can hear me now. You can hear sounds and can open your eyes. I can't believe how much you're growing and developing in such a compact space. It really blows my mind. From what I read they say it's a good time to start talking to you, to sing, or to read to you. I know I haven't interacted with you much yet. Don't judge me too harshly. It's kind of a new experience talking to somebody I can't see. But I like letting you know I'm here and that I am fully aware of your existence. Your Dad likes to play a game with me where he asks me what my dreams are. Lately, the only dreams on my mind are ones I have for you. I have so many hopes and dreams for you already. 

I have just a few months left to prepare for you to come into your Dad's and my life. There are some days where I get so overwhelmed at the thought of your arrival, and other days where I don't worry at all. I wonder what you'll make of us-your Dad and I. I'll let you know right now we are not perfect people. But we are good people who love each other, and now love you too. Your Dad is a wonderful, kind, man. He is the quiet to my loud, and the rational to my emotional. He is the thoughtful to my off-the-handle, and the laughter to my serious. He makes me so very happy. I always want you to know how much I love your Dad and how much he loves me. If there is anything that can calm me down when I have my overwhelming moments, it's knowing that your Dad loves me and will be right by my side through all of this. 

Lincoln, I won't always know what to do, or the right words to say. But I promise you I will try with everything I have to be a good mother to you. No matter my flaws or insecurities, I will always be there for you. Always. 


Your mother